"She moved on and I feel sorry for you, because she overlooked your flaws, your temper, your selfishness, your inability to love anyone but yourself. She could have anyone in the world, but she still chose you every time. All you are now is a crease in her past, a scar on her chest, a memory that fades faster than a photograph of you in a sealed box, hidden. Maybe now she will fight for someone who loves her, instead of someone who sucks the life out of her, never satisfied, even with her beating heart in his greedy hands."
The other night I was in a funk I couldn’t get out of, I kept crying to the point where my heart felt like it was breaking because I know I’m going to have this disorder for the rest of my life and I know I won’t be able to have and maintain a normal relationship with someone I love and I know my friendships won’t work either. Like this is it, I have this disorder, things can help me deal with it but nothing can take it away. And I’m angry at that fact. More sad I think though. I can’t have a normal relationship like everyone else will get to, and don’t even get me started on kids, if I have kids I predispose them to at least 4 different mental illnesses before they’re even born into this crappy world, does anyone truly realise how shitty that is. Like I’d rather not have kids than give this to anyone else and have a psychotic episode triggered the moment my kids are born (fuck that). No one understands how horrible this is and how shitty it’s going to be for me for the rest of my life. Fuck you to everyone who laughs about me or who’s ever made a joke about me or to those people who talk about me bc there’s nothing better to talk about, like honest to whatever spiritual entity there may be you’re a bunch of cunts, that’s the nicest way I can put it.
Fuck you all, fuck my life. I’m out
